We didn’t think the adoration Alabama fans have for Crimson Tide head coach Nick Saban could get any more fanatical than at least one man voting for Saban for U.S. President and another teaching his son to recognize the coach before walking.
But on Thursday, AL.com reported that two suspects were wanted for stealing a Nick Saban cutout from a Tuscaloosa BP gas station early Wednesday.
Reads the story: “Officers responding to a theft call at 1 a.m. at the gas station at 1405 University Boulevard were told that one suspect took the cutout when the cashier wasn’t looking and that another suspect opened the door for him so they could leave, said Tuscaloosa police spokesman Sgt. Brent Blankley.”
Yep, these two aren’t exactly Bonnie and Clyde.
Police released two photos of the thieves that have earned themselves a place in “The World’s Dumbest Criminals” for stealing something as worthless as a cardboard cutout from a place as heavily monitored as a gas station.
By the end of Thursday, the cutout had been returned with an apology to the BP station and, as Deadspin put it, our long national nightmare was over.
Said BP station owner Jay Rupani to the Tuscaloosa News: “I’m glad to have it back. This is our pride — it’s Nick Saban.”